There was a time, not so long ago, when I would mention Newport and people would nod politely and ask whether I meant the one near Cardiff. I would say no, the other one, the one in Pembrokeshire, and I could watch the interest drain out of their face somewhere around the second syllable.
This has changed in recent years as (the much better!) Newport keeps popping up in ‘perfect destination for your staycation’ type features – our own tongue-in-cheek comparison of Pembrokeshire v Cornwall clearly inspired the nations journalists… In all seriousness, maybe I have just spotted more coverage of our favourite corner of the earth but there seems to have been a notable increase in national press coverage.
This has got me thinking. Are we about to be swamped by a tidal wave of unruly tourists? I think it is time to set the record straight and show that all that glitters in not gold and address Newport’s many problems:
The beach is far too big
Traeth Mawr literally means big beach.
It is not called Traeth Mawr because the locals ran out of adjectives. As the tide goes out, you will see the vast expanse of sand being unveiled. You will have to walk for quite a while before you reach anything resembling the sea.
There is no kiosk halfway. There is no one selling you an inflatable flamingo. It is just sand, and then more sand, and then eventually the Irish Sea, and by the time you get there you have to walk all the way back again.
Frankly, it is a lot of beach for the money, and I do not trust it.
There is a mountain directly behind the town
Carningli. It sits above Newport looking mystical and it takes about an hour to get up if you are not in a rush, which you will not be, because there is nowhere to rush to. There is nothing at the summit except for the 360 degree views.
The problem is the descent. People come back down having experienced the majestic beauty and they are insufferable for the rest of the week. They start using the word “light”. They talk about the weather as though it were a personality.
You do not want this for yourself and you certainly do not want it for whoever you are travelling with.
You cannot get a coffee you recognise
No Costa. No Starbucks. Nothing with a reassuring green logo to tell you where you are. You will be forced to buy your morning coffee from lovely cafes such as Blas at Fronlas. There is no drive through service available.
Some people find this charming. Those people have low standards.
The pubs fill up
Actually, there is some truth to this one, as I mentioned in our Newport summer round up.
I will break character briefly, because it matters more than the joke. If you wander into Newport at one o’clock on a Saturday in August without a table booked, you will most likely end up eating a bag of crisps on the wall by the boat club. It does get (a bit) busy in the height of the summer season and it is definitely worth ringing ahead. Even a day is usually enough.
Right. Back to it.
Nobody is in any particular hurry
Conversations here take longer than they need to. A two minute errand becomes twenty because someone asks about your week. It is an incredibly friendly place.
If you are someone that prefers brisk, efficient transactions with a stranger who has no interest in you whatsoever, this will be a difficult holiday.
You have to take your shoes off to cross the river
At low tide, you can wade the Nevern from the Parrog straight across to Traeth Mawr.
Shoes off, trousers rolled to the knee, cold water round the ankles, everyone shrieking. Get the tide wrong and you walk the long way round by the Iron Bridge instead and feel a bit of a fool.
It is undignified. It is freezing. Your children will talk about it for years.
The grim truth
In case you have not noticed, this post is just a bit of Tuesday morning fun whilst I sit in the office dreaming of beautiful Newport 🙂
We are, of course, biased, but believe that the press coverage of Newport in recent months / years is fully deserved. It is a special place for so many people. It retains a certain (old fashioned?) charm that really does set it apart. Yes, life is slow and there are no coffee chains, but it is utterly glorious as a result.
If that doesn’t appeal, you should go to Cornwall. Take the A30. Take your time.
If you like what you read, we would love to welcome you at Peg-y-Don. The calendar is pretty much full for the rest of this summer (and next summer is filling up fast) but you should not rule out Autumn if you are not tied to school holidays, as it is a glorious time to visit.
